Nazım Özgün Afşin: ‘They live together in peace,’ my Uncle Hrant once said

* Photo: Miran Manukyan

Click to read the article in Turkish

Agos Newspaper Editor-in-Chief Hrant Dink was commemorated in front of the Sebat Apartment, where he was killed 15 years ago yesterday, on January 19, 2007. Nazım Özgün Afşin, who was five years old when Dink was killed, also made a speech at the commemoration ceremony. We publish the full text of Nazım Özgün Afşin's speech...

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"When my Uncle Hrant was murdered, I was five. Back then, I was not able to speak to the extent my peers could since I am an individual with autism. Regrettably, I do not remember Uncle Hrant much. But my mom used to tell me all about him as they were friends. And Uncle Hrant knew me as a baby. The only thing I vaguely remember of him is his very big hands. He used to put his hand on my head, stroking my hair.

In fact, I am cognizant of the way I remember his hands. If you have an autistic brain you tend to recall what others won't remember, and over time you learn that recalling things that no one remembers is not bizarre. When it comes to my Uncle Hrant's face, of course, I know his face from the photographs. As I grew older, I have seen many photos of him, watched his interviews multiple times, and read books about him.

Some stones have a tongue, they speak to the ones that heed them. Just like the stone of my Uncle Hrant. To me, the stone laid on the pavement in front of the Agos newspaper building means a lot more than a mere place where my Uncle Hrant was shot and fell. This very stone represents our meeting point, for me going to this very stone is tantamount to visiting my Uncle Hrant...Every year on January 19th, as I stand by this stone, I sigh "I wish I could see him now". I never step my feet on the stone. As I address you today, the same emotions evoke in me: I wish I could conserve with my Uncle Hrant in my current age, I wish he could look at my school grades and give me a big smile... "Never dare to give up on this child, he has a different fabric, a unique soul", this is what he told my mom when I was diagnosed with autism. I so much wish that my Uncle Hrant could have witnessed my acceptance to Hacettepe University. If only he could see that...

15 years is a long time for everyone, in my case, it almost equals my entire life. If one goes to the same commemoration event on the same date each year throughout his entire life, as he grows up, as a child, in his youth, then one never forgets what he has heard during these events.

I was standing in a big crowd, as a little child; that crowd was particularly silent, every now and then chanting "We are all Hrant, we are all Armenian". Even though I was not able to articulate these words back then, I have always thought "This is how it should feel to be one". When I was a child, I was scared of crowds, noise, and buzz. Now that I reminisce about those days, I also come to realize that one of the very rare crowds where I feel good has been the crowd of January 19th. I have always felt good among the thousands of "familiar" yet unknown people who came over to my Uncle Hrant. I believe Uncle Hrant would be happy to know this.

It was many years later when I listened to my Uncle Hrant's beloved wife Rakel Dink and her address at the funeral. I have never forgotten her words: "Whoever the assassin may be, I know that he was once a baby. My brothers and sisters, one cannot accomplish anything without first questioning the darkness that creates an assassin from such a baby."

Over the past 15 years, if I have learnt anything about the importance of questioning, being curious, living together, struggling against injustice and rights violations, and corroding impact of discrimination and othering on society, it is largely because of the speeches delivered in all commemoration events as well as everything my Uncle Hrant wrote about the things he had to go through, and the horrendous, brutal end he had to suffer.

My Uncle Hrant once said, and I quote:

"I know three languages.
Armenian, Kurdish, and Turkish.
These three languages never fight inside me,
They live together in peace!"

When I was a child, people would say "He will never be able to talk". Yet today, I am able to speak three languages including my native Turkish. I am very careful to make sure that these languages live inside me without fighting among themselves, that they help me acquire more knowledge. For my Uncle Hrant had taught so, how can I ever forget this?

During his commemoration address on 19 January 2015, eight years after Uncle Hrant's assassination, writer-poet Murathan Mungan made the following remarks: "Babies born then have learned to speak, to read and write. The dead body of Hrant Dink, however, still lies spread on this sidewalk as the victim of a murder, the true story of which has still not been brought to light. Those who leave the world in desolation with their loss, multiply life with their memories and with what they have entrusted us... And we who are watching over that entrusted legacy have been meeting here for the last eight years to voice our quest for justice and truth, to cry out that we will not abandon Hrant's dead body to the ruthless hands of oblivion."

Over the past 15 years, on various occasions and events, I have seen and experienced how our quest for justice, our struggle for peace, our desire for living together, and our need for freedom continued without subsiding. During his address, Murathan Mungan also said, and I quote: "When justice remains undone, it multiplies its murderers and its victims." If Uncle Hrant would have known about the precious people and children we lost in the last 15 years, my elder brothers we lost during the Gezi Park events, doves of peace murdered in Ankara, I am sure he would also endorse this sentence.

In 2019, I was already 17 when I came to the commemoration on January 19th. During her commemoration address, Filiz Ali, the daughter of Sabahattin Ali remarked, and I quote: "Dear Hrant, even so, we are not that hopeless. There are those who do not remain silent, we are still here, we do not go anywhere, we do not give up. Those who were only children at the time of your assassination, are here today, together with us. They are going after your murders, asking questions, they do not remain silent." I felt very happy to hear her words, Filiz Ali was talking about me, she was calling out right to me.

In 2020, in her address, my beloved Professor Şebnem Korur Financı dwelled upon seeking the truth and never giving up. She said, and I quote: "The quest for justice is not coming to an end, it has never ended. Even if they drag along Saturday Mothers/People on the ground, even if they jail those that cry out the truth, even if they crack down on us to suppress us with crimes against humanity, we will not give up, as Hrant did never give up on speaking the truth. It is not our cause to nurture hatred towards evil. Our cause is an infinite struggle. So that people do not get carried away with the banality of evil, and they continue their struggle for rights without bowing down to power."

At that very moment, I felt relieved. Sometimes you might feel that certain words have been uttered only for you. As I grew older, on every January 19th, I kept making a promise, and I will keep that promise: I shall not forget, I shall not give up!

I am only one out of millions of young people who are gravely concerned about the future of this country, yet who do not refrain from speaking out. I will continue my struggle to be able to say "We are here Ahparig, we don't give up!" for my Uncle Hrant, for justice, for peace, for a life free from discrimination, for our shared dream of a free, democratic, just, and peaceful Turkey. I will read a lot, heed a lot, watch a lot, and share a lot.

For I always remember the very last words my Uncle Hrant wrote, for I will always carry inside a "dovelike disquiet"...

I would like to thank each and every one of you for coming here today along with the disquiet dove inside you."

(HA/SD)

* Source: Hrant Dink Foundation official website